The W(h)ine Hour..

Every household has one…the whine hour. It’s those bewitching hours between approximately 5 and 8pm in the evening when the kids go crazy and moms across the world lose their minds completely. It doesn’t matter if you have babies, toddlers, kids, tweens, or teens; those hours of dinner/homework/bath time/ bedtime can just about do a momma in. What is a girl to do? It’s simple and brilliant actually, just slip in a little wine of your own! Now, I’m not suggesting anyone down a bottle of whiskey everyday between the hours of 5 and 8, in fact if you do that you will have a few whine hours of your own the next morning. Basically, a little wine during the whine hours will keep you out of the padded cell at the local cookoo house where people will walk by and peek in your little window and say things like “aww, poor mom has lost her marbles” and “hmmm, now that’s a crazy one right there, sits in there all day and hits herself over the head with a Barbie and a hotwheel”. Don’t smirk, it can happen.

So, enjoy the tales of my whine hour, and how I survive each and everyone of one of them with a sense of humor and a good bottle of wine! After all, the whine hour comes around every single day, a girl has to be prepared!


Tuesday, February 15, 2011

Tuesday, February 15th....1 out of 6 ain't bad.

Today I started singing it's a beautiful day in the neighborhood, a beautiful day in the neighborhood, would you be mine...could you be mine.  And all three of my kids looked at me like I had completely lost my mind.  I actually get that look frequently from them, but on this?  It's Mr. Roger's neighborhood people, why are you looking at me like that?   The little one starts in, "Mr Rogers?  Who is that?"  The middle adds, "is that the jerk up the street that hired the snow plow?" guys, Mr. Rogers is a kid's show that I used to watch, and he sang that song at the beginning of each episode, and it's such a pretty day today that's what came to my mind.  The little one is immediate in his response, "oh, was that back in the day?"  And, then the old lady comments start up..."yep, that was back in the day when mom was little, when they didn't have light bulbs."  "back when she was walkin with the dinosaurs." Then the yo momma's sooo old jokes started, "yo momma's so old she had the original copy of the ten commandments."  Oooookkkk, boys, that is quite enough, I am not that old!  Loving the big one who jumps right in with, "Guys!  She's only 26!  Wait, mom, that's kinda weird that you call yourself 26, I mean, I'm the math.  Gross."  It's time for a subject change....and fast!

After school today we had the extra pleasure of having some friends over!  I'm thinking I might win mom of the year for this one, because I'm not very good at having friends over.  Usually, my own three are quite enough.  But today, a friend needed help and having extras sound like a great idea on this beautiful day!  When they are being dropped off, I get to spend a couple of minutes visiting with another grown up...bonus!  After a few minutes of laughing at how crazy our 6 boys are, she needs to go and needs to take one of hers with her.  It is oddly quiet around the house for having 6 boys in it.  It is also oddly silent outside.  Uh oh. The youngest of the six is watching tv, "hey buddy, have you seen #'s 1-5?" He says not in awhile, so we head outside thinking we will find them playing some sort of sport out there.  Nope. Not a one of them is anywhere to be seen, or heard...and we are talking about some pretty loud boys here.  Disappeared...bikes are here, dirt bikes are here, razor is here...boys are not here.  So, great...we lost 5.  Well, 1 out 6 ain't bad! ;)  There goes that mom of the year award....again.

Funny things heard during the driveway basketball game this evening...
"I just kicked your astronaut"
"This isn't fair, dad's putting his 200 pounds of puddin on me."
"He just shoved me in the back."  followed by "no I didn't, I shoved you in the behind."  Huh? I don't even know.

Then they all come in, one with his pants pulled down.  What happened here?  "The game ended in a full moon."  Well, I guess that's better than with a fat lip and naughty words. ;)

The whine hour ended today with the oldest coming to me with his phone in hand.  "Hey mom, you know that website, damn auto correct? I've got one to add to that."  Grrrreat, why don't you tell me what it said and who you sent it to so I know what we are dealing with.  Apparently, he was trying to let his tennis coach know he was on his way out to the courts for practice...the text said, "see you in a sex".  Not see you in a sec which is what he was trying to say.  You can imagine the embarrassment for a 14 yr old boy sending that to his GIRL tennis coach.  Luckily, she has a sense of humor similar to mine and just laughed it off.  She told him not to worry about it, she would just save that one for later. :)  I reeeallly like her!

The wine of the day is Sunshine's a riesling.  I picked it for the sun that was shining down on us today.  Mr. Roger's and I are going to sip on that and sing a few bars about our beautiful neighborhood. ;)

Happy Tuesday!

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