The W(h)ine Hour..

Every household has one…the whine hour. It’s those bewitching hours between approximately 5 and 8pm in the evening when the kids go crazy and moms across the world lose their minds completely. It doesn’t matter if you have babies, toddlers, kids, tweens, or teens; those hours of dinner/homework/bath time/ bedtime can just about do a momma in. What is a girl to do? It’s simple and brilliant actually, just slip in a little wine of your own! Now, I’m not suggesting anyone down a bottle of whiskey everyday between the hours of 5 and 8, in fact if you do that you will have a few whine hours of your own the next morning. Basically, a little wine during the whine hours will keep you out of the padded cell at the local cookoo house where people will walk by and peek in your little window and say things like “aww, poor mom has lost her marbles” and “hmmm, now that’s a crazy one right there, sits in there all day and hits herself over the head with a Barbie and a hotwheel”. Don’t smirk, it can happen.

So, enjoy the tales of my whine hour, and how I survive each and everyone of one of them with a sense of humor and a good bottle of wine! After all, the whine hour comes around every single day, a girl has to be prepared!


Tuesday, April 19, 2011

Tuesday, April 19th...My Favorite Things

This past weekend the middle kid and I traveled to Nebraska to see my sister get married.  It was a beautiful wedding and my sister looked happier than I have ever seen her.  There really is nothing more important in life than being happy. :)

Having three boys relatively close in age makes it hard to spend one on one time with each kid.  The big kid and I have been to several tennis tournaments together recently and the little one is, well the little one, which just means more mom time.  Finding time to do things with just the middle is a challenge, so when this wedding came up and the little one needed to stay home for a baseball tournament, I jumped at the chance to take the middle guy and go!  You know the saying, "It was worth the price of admission"?  Here are the top 10 things I loved about spending time at a wedding with my middle guy!

10.  Surprising him with first class tickets (thanks to airline miles) and watching his reaction at the airport when he figured it out.  It went like this when we got to the check in counter, "No mom, not that line."  Yep, buddy we need to check in.  "No mom, that's the first class line."  Oh, well we are first class.  "WHAT?!?"  Lots of jumping up and down here..."We are FIRST CLASS?"  He's starting to get a little hyped up which equals lots of volume for him.  "YES!!  I'M A PRIORITY!"  People all around us are cracking up, which fuels that fire.  "OH YEAH, VIP COMING THRU...CHILL IS IN THE HOUSE!"  Chill is a nickname he has around our house, I'm not sure why, maybe we are trying for the self fulfilling prophecy thing? ;)

9.  Having the middle kid say "thank you" to a service man in uniform sitting behind us without me saying a word about it.  :)  He has a new appreciation for those people serving our country after this trip.  We witnessed many goodbyes in the different airports we were in; each one of them heartbreaking.  It's easy to take that job for granted until you are reminded of the sacrifices that are being made daily.

8.  Listening to the middle laugh at Bill & Ted's Excellent Adventure on the plane.  He was laughing from his toes,  his belly laugh was so loud people around us were laughing at him laughing, and the flight attendant came over to ask what in the world we were watching that was so funny.  That movie is a classic!

7.  Watching him loose his mind for a second in the airport when our second plane was delayed and then delayed again and then a gate change and then delayed again.  Waiting around is not for this kid and after about 45 minutes of them not loading the plane they had finally "found" for us he says quite loudly, (and in a crowd mind you), "If they don't load us on that plane soon I'm gonna go all Chuck Norris on someone!"  Three people standing near by chimed in with, "right behind you buddy."  Awesome...that does NOT help me make my point of waiting patiently. ;)

6.  Driving up to the hotel which was an "Inn & Suites" and listening to this conversation he was having with himself...out loud.  "It's an inn and suites.  So is it an inn?  Or is it a suite?  Are we staying in a suite or the inn?  Is the inn just a room?  Maybe it's just a sweet room not a suite of rooms?  Mom..Mom...which is it, an inn or a suite?"  Ooops, I guess he was actually having that conversation with me. ;)  Turns out it wasn't a suite or sweet. ;)

5.  Listening to this conversation between my nephew and the middle after I told them it was time to get dressed and go to the church.
Middle:  "Time to go."
Nephew:  "What?  It's only 1:30, the wedding's not til 4, we've got plenty of time."
Middle:  "Well, my mom said it's time to go and if I don't get this cleaned up and get ready she's gonna open up a can of whoop a on me."
Oh yeah baby, I've still got my bluff in on this one!  And, I'm pretty excited he just said "A" instead of the whole word even when he didn't know I was listening! :)  Victory!

4.  Seeing my middle man in a tux.  So grown up looking and so handsome.  I'm not at all biased. ;)

3.  Listening to the wedding coordinator explain to the middle how to light the candles.  She's a "we" person, you know the kind that talks to you like you are 5 years old and uses the word we when she's talking just to you.  I'm finding this whole scene very funny, only because "we" are just sitting on the pew watching. ;)  She has him fake light all the candles on the grooms side and then takes him across to the bride's side stopping in the middle to offer some useful instructions on the unity candle.  "Now, middle kid, we don't want to light these candles.  They are for someone else to light.  Understand?  N O means no."  And then as if he might not understand the meaning of that she offers it up once again, "N....O means NO."  That must have been his breaking point, because he busts out laughing.  And, because he has just a little bit of his momma in him he turns to me and says, "Hey mom...get that?  N  O means no, WE aren't going to light those candles."  ;)  His sarcasm and smart alecness are totally lost on her, she is just overjoyed that he apparently understood her instructions.  :))

2.  Watching the middle kid do the worm at the reception.  That kid can seriously bust a move.  I'm pretty sure he gets that from me. ;)

1.  Posing for a pre-wedding photo with my sister.   That might not sound like it should be my #1 reason for loving a weekend away with my middle, but only my middle could have made pre-wedding photos fun like this.  Seriously, the kid has comedic timing like no other, besides maybe Kramer from Seinfeld and his was all scripted. ;)  Just as the photographer was taking aim he made a sideways dive in front of us in an attempt to get in the pic.  Below is how that worked out.

Chill. Is. In. The. Hoooouuusseeee!

The wine for today is The Stump Jump reisling.  I mentioned this out loud and the ensuing jumping around was enough to make me choose it.  Somehow the word stump also conjured up a few jokes too (not sure why I was surprised by this.) The big one starts off with, "hrrrr hrrr, nice stump."  Followed right up by the middle with, "hrrr, that's what she said." Ohhh, for crying out loud must I take the word stump out of my vocabulary too?  Note to self....choose your words veeerrryyy carefully, I must never let my guard down with these three, lest I make the mistake of saying something crazy like, "Careful, that might be a booby trap."  That actually came all the way out of my mouth before I realized the can of worms I was opening up. Never ever say the word booby....rookie mistake. ;) 

Happy Tuesday!


Steve Curry said...

Too funny...thanks Vicki!

Anonymous said...

Good for you - what an awesome trip to share with your middle man. I have 3 boys too, and I find it so tricky to have that one on one time.
My middle man is a little comedian too - must be a middle thing?
Visiting from The Fibro. :)

Life In A Pink Fibro said...

Love it! "Ma, I'm a priority!" is the best line in the whole post.

Thanks for Rewinding at the Fibro.